Summer holidays across two homes
April 2026
Summer is the longest stretch of the year when everyday routines stop. For co-parents sharing care, that means longer blocks away from one home, travel plans across borders, and decisions that need to hold up months in advance. The first summer after a separation is often the hardest — but the patterns you set now carry into every summer after.
Why summer planning is different
Daily and weekly arrangements are built around school, work, and nearby routines. Summer breaks most of that — schools close for several weeks, both parents usually take vacation, grandparents travel, and summer camps fill up early.
The result is that the regular care schedule rarely carries through July and August without changes. Most families agree on a separate summer arrangement each year, documented in advance.
Treat the summer plan as its own agreement, not a variation of the weekly schedule. It needs its own dates, its own handovers, and its own written version that both parents can point to.
Start earlier than feels necessary
By the time one parent asks about summer in late May, it is often too late. Flight prices have risen, summer camps are full, and grandparents have booked their own plans. The other parent's vacation weeks may already be locked in at work.
A reasonable rule: have the main decisions made by April. That means deciding which weeks each parent will have the child, whether travel abroad is planned, and whether any camps or courses will be booked.
This does not mean every day needs to be scheduled in April. Flexibility is fine — but the large blocks should be agreed early. Small adjustments in June are much easier than building the whole plan from scratch at that point.
Ways to split the summer
Halving the summer is the simplest — each parent has half the break in one continuous block. It works well when both parents want longer trips and when the child is old enough for a longer stretch away from each home. Alternating two-week blocks is often better for younger children, and for parents who live close enough that contact during each block is easy.
Alternating full summers is used by parents who live far apart — different countries, or cities with long travel times. One parent has the full summer one year, the other the next. The parent without summer care typically gets a larger share of another holiday to balance it.
For public holidays that fall inside summer — midsummer, national days, bank holidays — many families alternate year by year. Parent A has midsummer in odd years, Parent B in even years. Write it down, so the question does not come up again.
Travel, passports, and consent
If either parent plans to travel abroad with the child, written consent from the other parent is usually required — by airlines, by border authorities, and in some cases by the destination country. Requirements vary, so check what the specific countries involved ask for.
Know who has the child's passport, and check that it is valid for the trip — some countries require six months of validity beyond the return date. A short signed letter from the non-traveling parent, with dates, destination, and the child's details, prevents problems at check-in. Some airlines ask for a notarised version; others accept a signed scan. Ask before the trip, not at the gate.
If you expect difficulty getting consent, resolve it well in advance — not the day before travel. Waiting until the last minute turns a paperwork question into a conflict.
What the child needs during the switch
Longer summer blocks can be harder on children than the regular weekly switches. They are away from one home for longer, routines change, and friends may be in one place and not the other. The child should know the plan — not every detail, but the shape of the summer. Uncertainty is harder for most children than a plan they do not love.
The child does not need to choose. Framing questions as "do you want to be with mum or dad" puts them in an impossible position. The parents make the plan; the child is told. Let things travel with the child — a favourite stuffed animal, a book, a charger. Small continuity items make longer blocks easier.
Keep transitions calm. The handover day into a two-week block is not the moment for long conversations about rules or expectations. That can wait a day or two.
When you cannot agree
Summer is often where disagreements surface. One parent wants a trip the other does not approve of. Vacation weeks clash at work. A grandparent visit only works in one specific week. Put the proposal in writing — specific dates, specific plan. It is harder to argue productively in conversation than when both parents can look at the same written version.
Suggest alternatives, not objections alone. "I cannot do week 28, but week 26 or 29 would work" is easier to respond to than "that does not work for me." If direct discussion stalls, family counselling services offer mediation for exactly this — often a few focused sessions on a single practical agreement, like summer.
Once an agreement is reached, write it down. Dates, who has the child when, travel details, handover times and places. A written summary both parents can refer back to prevents re-negotiation in June when somebody remembers a different version.
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